How To Stay Values-Aligned During This Holiday Season

I LOVE talking about values with my clients (and anyone else, for that matter).  These discussions are special to me because our individual values define who we are and what is important to us.  As I’ve gotten older, I have found that my values are more clearly defined and fully encompass my grounded, authentic self. 

What are Values?

Here is a quick definition of values: Values are the beliefs or principles that guide behavior, choices, and actions. They reflect what a person or group considers important, worthwhile, or desirable.

How to Better Understand our Individual Values? 

One way to better define your values is to journal about the things that feel most important to you.  Do you like structure and order? Then a top value for you might be harmony.  Do you enjoy spending most of your time with others? A top value of yours might be social connection. Another activity that can help you better understand your values is to use the Live Your Values deck (what a fun Christmas present!).  The deck invites you to look at each card and place them into different categories: “Matters Most To Me”, “Matters Some To Me” and “Doesn’t Matter To Me.” Then you strip down the “Matters Most To Me” category to your top ten (this is really difficult!).  Now you have your top ten values.  On the back of each card there are ideas to explore and embrace this value from day to day.  My top values from doing this activity are:

Family

Spirituality

Adventure

Non-Conformity

Humility

Resilience

Growth

Integrity

Intuition

Work Ethic 

It is probably no surprise to many of you that non-conformity is a top value of mine.  My practice and business is named based on the nature of this value. Untamed stands for my belief and practice of not conforming to our toxic culture, especially diet culture, but instead staying true to myself. Embrace your weird, quirky self!  In fact, Romans 12:2 states, "Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind."

How Do You Stay True to Your Values? 

Once you have more clearly defined and understand your values, it might be helpful to reflect on how you live out this value in your daily life.  For example, if you value civility, how are you exercising politeness, respect and courtesy towards other people through your actions and words?  For me, I stay true to non-conformity by not engaging in diet culture, toxic fitness culture, or beauty culture.  I severely limit my time and exposure to social media and I even refrain from supporting certain figures in pop culture. Being intentional with your words and actions means you truly identify with this value.  If you are finding yourself straying from a value, then it may not actually be a top one for you yet.  The values that you find the most important to you are the ones you put intentional effort, time, and energy into.  My top value is family; I put intentional effort, time and energy into caring for my family - I play and read to my daughter, I go on dates with my husband, I cook and clean for them.  I do all of these activities because I value our family unit and I enjoy giving them my time and energy.  How are you investing your time and energy?  Does it align with your top values or are you getting off track?

How To Navigate this Holiday Season Staying Values-Aligned

It’s no secret that holidays are challenging.  You may be forced to spend time with people you don’t enjoy being around.  You may have to attend parties that are loud and overwhelming.  So, how do you stay true to yourself and your values during the holidays?  Below are some of my tips:

• Do a values exercise to better understand what they are 

• Reflect on how you live out these values in your daily life 

• Refrain from spending time and energy on activities that do not align with your values - this may be intentionally not spending time talking to Uncle Joe about his latest diet or not attending a party that involves heavy drinking. 

• Keep yourself grounded by not engaging in conformity around the holiday season - this could be things like restricting, drinking, gossiping, etc. 

• Stay true to yourself.  Do you need to limit the parties or the amount of time spent at one?  Do you need to take a break and get some fresh air?  Do you prefer to go on a vacation during the holidays? 

If you need more support around the holiday season, Untamed Nutrition Therapy is offering 30 minute drop in support sessions for $30 only, starting Monday, November 24th.  You can book a session here by clicking on “Allison Leigh Bone.”  Take care of yourself out there!