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Lean into More Joyful Movement this Season

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I grew up in a rural Michigan town where the “place-to-be” on a crisp Autumn Friday night
was the high school football field.  Like most midwestern towns, sports was the heartbeat of the community.  As a kid and teen growing up in this environment, many of us quickly learned to find our place by participating on local sports teams.  I grew up doing gymnastics and horseback riding, did some cross country running in middle school, then picked up diving in high school.  I ended up with a season-ending injury during my senior year of gymnastics season, which would end up being career-ending during my walk-on freshman season at Michigan State University.  A year later, during my sophomore year at MSU, I transferred to the diving team.  This is when my eating disorder developed and would inevitably result in the end of my collegiate career as I was forced to sit out my last season.  This is when I secretly picked up running and started a decade-long abusive relationship with the sport. 


Fast forward to today, almost two decades after graduating from undergraduate school at MSU and I’ll be heading to the Boston Marathon in April, 2025.  This achievement came after full eating disorder and exercise addiction recovery, as well as a 12 year hiatus from competitively racing.  When I moved to North Carolina after completing my dietetic internship I started running with a local running group and ran my first few marathons in a span of a couple years.  At this point, I was at rock bottom with my eating disorder, battling with recovery, and my relationship with running was tumultuous to say the least.  After completing these first few races, I knew I needed to take time off.  My times were getting slower, my body was hurting, and my motivation to run was just the compulsion I needed to get through each day.  At the same time, I desperately wanted my life to be different - more free, more flexible, more fun.  This is when I started taking small steps every day towards recovery: staying on a meal plan, actually using coping skills, learning about my emotions, and completely changing the way I moved my body. 


For several years, I did not engage in running at all. And for over a decade, I did not set foot in a competitive race.  In the years I took a break from running, I picked up yoga, stretching, adult gymnastics, and hiking.  I moved from North Carolina, to Michigan, spent a significant amount of time in Florida working in professional sports, to California, and back to Michigan.  2024 marked the year that I finally felt ready to get competitive again.  With several years of reconnecting to running under my belt, as well as full nourishment, and lots of therapy, I felt I was in the best head-space to commit to the training and stepping back into the mass start.  It was worth the wait!  My first marathon this year was a personal best by 9 minutes, even though I was 12 years older and in a larger body than my last marathon.  In early September I ran my final marathon of the year and set another personal record to secure my spot in the 2025 Boston Marathon by almost 8 minutes.  


What has contributed to this accomplishment?  As a clinician that specializes in difficult food and exercise situations, as well as someone who has lived experience recovering from both, below are some of the strategies that best supported my journey.  Please take what feels good to you and leave what doesn’t: 


  • Ask yourself these questions when engaging in movement: 

    • Am I enjoying engaging in this type of movement today?

    • Am I listening to what my body is telling me?  Am I able to listen to my body? 

    • Am I able to not engage in this movement and still function throughout my day?

    • Am I missing out on other activities or experiences because I am prioritizing this movement? 

  • Talk about it!  Discuss it in therapy and with your dietitian (or your entire team if you have one!)  These professionals are trained to help you process your relationship with exercise and help be a guide towards a more balanced life. 

  • Take a break.  As seen in my story above, I took a significant break from the movement that was causing me the most turmoil.  The best way to challenge the compulsion is to take a break from the compulsive activity and get support while doing it. 

  • Add in restorative movement.  Activities like walking in nature, hiking, and yoga can be life giving and allow you to connect with your body on a deeper level. 

  • Challenge the beliefs we hold from toxic fitness culture.  Yes, movement can be great for mental health, but you do not have to exercise to be “healthy.”  Lots of “healthy” people do not enjoy exercise.  It’s time to challenge the status quo and lean into your own genuine truth and beliefs; not those that have been passed down to us. 


Exercise does not have to control you.  You can have a healthy and more balanced relationship with movement.  It takes considerable time and discomfort, but you can get there.  If you’re needing support in your relationship with movement don’t hesitate to reach out to us at hello@untamednutrition.com.


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